yea... today is 080808, a very special date, that came once every 100 years... and whats more, today is the opening ceremony for 2008 Beijing Olympics Game... wow!! what a great meaningful day...
well, something to jot down here is, today, the one who has not talk to me since Monday, finally talked with me today... the ambiance is weird, and we talked like strangers, as for me, i talked to him too after he talked to me in the morning... i have seek for him for some job's issue which was done by him, and i said "excuse me..." i don't even called his name... after that, he looked at me, as if expecting me to talk more to him... well, i did not do that... its meaningless now to do anything anymore... i need to let go, i need to move on... so, pls help me to be consistent... since you don't want to be close to me anymore, just be consistent to it... i don't mind it at all... i have gone through the lowest point of this relationship, no, we don't have any relationship ever since... i have gone through the lowest point in my life, and i belief, i can handle it better than before, and you need not feel guilty anymore (if you ever feel guilty on what u did to me).
have been in very low mood since Monday, and Tuesday, was the worst... i cried for all day after KF been retrenched... i was so sad... really really sad for what was happening... to me, she is the most capable in her department (aside from programming matters), but she is the one been chosen. honestly, i rather i am the one being retrenched... she called me and ask me why did my hand so cold when she shake hand and said good bye to me... she probably thought i was worrying for myself... actually, many people was thinking the same, Alvin was so worried bout me, he e-mailed to me to check if i am safe... frankly, it touches me so much... that means, i found some real n true frens here in MCT, not only plastics... hahaha!!! well, i was not worrying bout myself, as i somehow wish i will be retrench, so that i can leave this company soon... with no turning points... my hand was cold at that time is becoz of my heart felt cold... fed up to the management, fed up on the decision they made...
the low mood keep bothering me, i could not sleep well, kept on dreaming, fire, bombs, gossips... those are the things appeared in my dreams... so helpless, so lost... i dont know where i should go... but i wanna go! til late wednesday's late evening, i got a call, and it cheered me up... and of coz, my dear devil chef too played a very important role to cheer me up... not to forget i got someone to propose to me to be his gf, while i don't even know how he looks like... that's the funniest... hahahaha!!!
i am on half day leave today, as i went for something important for myself, and i am hoping i will be able to success on it! good luck to me! Happy 080808 to all!!!
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